In honor of this insane page, I offer some back stories.
Georgette and Randy were devastated when his dog ate their engagement ring. However, they went ahead and posed for their engagement photo shoot, after Georgette used plenty of Visine for her eyes. She wore a drugstore ring in place of the real thing. And then, just when Randy was about to shoo his dog off, they looked into his butt and saw that the ring was emerging!
Matilda and Ralph had a very long and happy marriage. On their honeymoon, they had placed a wager. 50 years later, Matilda lost.
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