Tuesday, November 1, 2016

The 17 Steps to Nanowrimo Victory

I’m using the Snowflake method to write my Nanowrimo novel this year. In honor of that, I’d like to reveal the top 17 steps to winning Nanowrimo.

17. Outline your novel. Be verbose here. Every word counts!
16. Compete in word sprints with other Nanos
15. Decide that everything you’ve written is total crap and the whole thing is arbitrary and stupid.
14. Read through the forums on nanowrimo and comment on every thread.
13. Write “I don’t know what to write” about 50 times. Count every word and don’t delete it!
12. Take a break from writing, just for one day, because so far you’re doing really well.
11. Notice that suddenly you have to write 3317 words a day to win Nano.
10. Have three amazing writing days and knock out a third of your novel.
9. Weep as you look at the shitty first draft and wonder why you do this to yourself every year.
8. Write “the end.” Realize that you are only at 45637 words and you can think of nothing else to write.
7. Get really graphic with descriptions.
6. Use “Replace” function to change every “I’m” to “I am,” every “can’t” to “can not”, etc.
5. Create a random subplot to fill in words.
4. Despair and binge on chocolate or caffeine (or both)
3. Be encouraged by your fellow writers.
2. Write “the  end” and submit your word count to the website, only to discover that you have MORE than 50,000 words.
1. Change all your social media graphics to display your nanowrimo victory.

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