I remember my dreams. And last night, God talked to me through my dream.
I don’t think that’s crazy or woo woo or extreme, by the way. I think God is talking to lots of us, maybe all of us, in our dreams.
So in the dream, which involved me being a lesbian and visiting my parents and forgetting to bring along my current cross stitch project, I was sitting on the porch with my girlfriend and my mom. And we were talking about God.
I said, “Look, I know you’re worried about me, because as a teacher and spiritual leader, you’re concerned that I will be judged more harshly than other Christians. You’re worried that because I am blunt and honest and feminist and outspoken, I will make mistakes and get worse punishments. But I won’t. I’m not worried.
I’m not worried because I know that I am completely 100% safe with God. There is absolutely NOTHING God will do to me that will harm me. I know full well that I am a sack of shit. That I am a failure, that I make mistakes, that I sin. But that’s OK. Because I am loved by God no matter what.”
At this point, my audience interrupted me to remind me that I am only made new in Christ daily.
“No, no, I’m not. I’m made new in God with every breath I take! I’m made new in God with every beat of my heart! Every single time my heart beats, I am redeemed and forgiven and made new. Even though I’m down here (I gestured near the floor), God sees me way up here (I gestured towards the ceiling). NOTHING I do can stop God’s love for me and forgiveness of me.”
I’m not sure what the rest of the dream meant, if anything, but I know that God was talking to me (through me, haha) in that dream. For whatever reason, God wanted me to know that I am Her beloved. God wants me to remember that even though I screw up, it’s OK. I don’t have to be perfect. I don’t even have to TRY to be perfect. In every heart beat, in every breath, I am wholly redeemed, pure, and beloved in God’s eyes.
So are you.
I don’t care who you are or what you’ve done: God sees you as beautiful, whole, and perfect. God loves you. You are OK.